i feel bound by the physique that I had from the ages of 10-13...I hardly ate and everyday I spent thinking about calories

It was the only time in my life that I'd ever received male attention. It was the only time that my body was deemed acceptable. Even at my lowest weight, I still didn't feel good enough. I would do anything to look like this again, but I can never let myself truly come to terms with the fact that this is the physique of a child and I'm not a kid anymore....